Kids Say The Stupidest Things Continued...

I haven't posted about school in a little while. So as a celebration of half term arriving (yay!) here are a few more anecdotes...

1) It was in the news last week that people with the 'blue eyes' gene can all be traced back to the same ancestor, and that it happened due to a genetic mutation. Which led to one child coming to the following conclusion (very loudly at the lunch table):

'Everyone, did you know that all people with blue eyes are mutants?'

2) During the same meal, I noticed that one of the children had 'finished' his lunch in a record 2 minutes and was standing at the door ready for playtime. The following conversation occured:

Me: James, have you actually opened your packed lunch? You can't be finished already!

James: I've finished my lunch.

(I open lunchbox to find a whole pile of sandwiches and some crisps)

James: Oh. I didn't know they were there.

3) Hannah was reading aloud from a non-fiction book when she stated that:

'The Snugglers were very good at hiding things.'

I told her the term was 'smugglers'.

'Yes,' she agreed, before carrying on.

'Back then, there were lots of Snugglers' Caves...'

I have a feeling they weren't as cosy as they sounded.

4) Finally, I set a piece of homework last week which required the children to write a reply to this distressed woman's letter:

52 Wood Lane

Darksville

Thursday 31st January

Dear Class,

My daughter Goldilocks keeps running off into the woods. She won't listen to a word I say. What can I do to make her listen and do as she is told?

Yours faithfully,

Goldilocks' Mum

Year 2 children are supposed to spend half an hour on their homework, and as a class we went through some examples of thoughtful advice that could be given. The children produced some fantastic letters, but one child in particular stood out as having obviously put a lot of thought, time and effort into his reply:

Dear Goldilocks' Mum,

Lock her in her room.

Yours sincerely,

Charlie

Eat your heart out, Jeremy Kyle.

Chocolate Tuesday

Yes, it's that time of year again. It's hard to believe Lent is nearly upon us already... I could've sworn Christmas was only last week. Last year, I tried to give up chocolate for Lent. I know it's not very original, but it really is such a big part of my life that giving it up always is a tough challenge. Unlike the year before last, when I gave up yoghurt... (I don't even really eat yoghurt). Anyway, I would have succeeded last year had it not been for those pesky M&M's:



In a moment of madness at a youth event last year, I confused them with these:

In my defence, they really did look like Skittles. When I realised what I'd done (it was quite near the end of Lent too, if I remember rightly) I reacted a little bit like this...

... Which I'm sure went down well during the quiet time of reflection at said youth event (I'm can't recall why we were asked to eat sweets, but we were!) Anyway, this time I will succeed. People have either laughed or scoffed disbelievingly when told about the challenge (apart from my dad, who just said 'Well, I shouldn't worry, you've eaten enough in the last two weeks to cover the whole of Lent...') so I'm determined to prove everyone wrong!

As you may have guessed from the title of this post, today has been spent (and the remainder of the day will be spent) eating as much chocolate as I can. It's just dawned on me that as of tomorrow there will be no more Kisses (of the Hershey's variety), no more Toffee Crisp Popcorn (why even bother going to the cinema?!) and according to Ben, no more Bourbon biscuits. I don't think they count as chocolate. Do they?

Wish me luck.

In the last 24 hours...

My mood has gone from this:

And this...

To this:

Hmm. Last night, I went to see 'Mamma Mia!' (as you may have guessed) in London. It must seem like I go to see shows all the time, but I really don't... Anyway, I loved every minute of it and was in a really good mood this morning, humming away to 'Honey, Honey' and other such tunes. I was curious to see how they would fit all those Abba songs into one storyline, but they just about managed it! I'm very excited about the film version coming out in July.

Then, this afternoon we went to see Sweeney Todd, and for the first time in my entire life I discovered a musical that I didn't immediately fall in love with (unlike Tim). It was really well made and the acting was superb, but there was just a little too much gore and depression for me. That wouldn't normally put me off, as I really enjoyed 'Jekyll and Hyde' when it was touring as a musical, but for some reason this one just didn't appeal. It's a first. Maybe there'll be a stage version and I'll really like that.

In the last 24 hours I have also discovered that one of my all-time favourite restaurants (when I was younger) is no longer as magical as it used it be. I won't mention the name of it, but it has moving gorillas, elephants, toucans etc. and a tropical storm every 20 minutes*. Which is all very well and good, but it was very much a case of 'Spot the Waiter'... even when he was delivering water, I blinked and missed him (he kinda threw it down on the table as he ran past). Then, as John was trying to sort out the change I'd left on the table for a tip, he raced past, picked up the pound coins, and disappeared without saying a word! Rude.

* It sounds a little bit like the Jungle Cafe in Southend (minus the tropical storm), but that's not the place I'm talking about...

Have we missed our callings as celebrity lookalikes...?!

Probably not. Apparently, according to this website, my friend Heather and I bear remarkable resemblances to Mandy Moore and Kelly Clarkson. I can't quite see it myself, but the morph thing is pretty cool.

Katie/Kelly

%1

Heather/Mandy

%1

On a completely different note, I would also like to apologise to all cookie workers around the country. Awhile ago, I wrote a blog post questioning the importance of receipts at a well known chain of cookie stores. Well, it turns out that post is easily accessible via Google, and as a result someone commented on it stating exactly why they make you wait ages for a receipt you don't want.

Fairy nuff.

Elephants and Other Thoughts

I wish I was an elephant,

All big and fat and round

And wander through the jungle

Just elephin' around.

- Rumble in the Jungle

1) Now, John may be better at languages than me (as in he is fluent in five languages and I'm fluent in one) and he may know more about where countries are located (and which places just sound like countries but actually aren't). I even discovered the other day that he can do this*:



(That isn't actually John, obviously)

But when it comes to making elephants out of modelling materials, I think it's obvious who's the expert. After all, I DID do a degree in it (That's not completely true. I actually have a BA in Primary Education... just in case people get their hopes up that a BA in Elephant Art actually exists- although how cool would that be?!) Anyway, using Stacey's playdough gift, this is my creation:


He even has wrinkles! I then introduced him to Wilbur (My Slovakian Elephant- you'd be surprised just how many there are in Bratislava) who I'm pretty sure was fooled into thinking that he was the real thing:


You can tell by the expression on his face... I think I've proved my point.

2) Yesterday, I did something I have never done before. I went to see a film at the cinema... for the second time. And I made three observations:

- If you want someone to get emotionally involved in a film that you really like (in this case, P.S. I Love You) don't let them sit next to Ben. This is Ben:

I should have known better.

- Toffee Crisp Popcorn is my new favourite thing... whoever thought of that idea was a GENIUS.

Yep, it really is 'Five Star Munch'.

- If you agree to share popcorn with somebody, it's probably not the best idea to sit two seats away from them. Apparently it's a little inconsiderate to the person sat inbetween them.


That is all.



* I really, really want to be able to make the water drop sound. So much so that I looked at a tutorial on YouTube... but I still can't do it. And I've been flicking the side of my face so much that my cheek is sore. I've put the tutorial video in the right hand side, see if you can do it (it's only 3 minutes long...) Good luck!

23

Yesterday, I turned 23. The big one... (Yes, it has not yet been widely recognised that 23 has replaced 21 as the most important birthday). To celebrate this, I've had a bit of a birthday week. Had a murder mystery party, had a 'surprise' party at school (the organisation skills of seven year olds are so under rated), and am in the middle of the best birthday weekend to date. In the last 24 hours I have eaten no less than three consecutive three course meals (with a fourth tomorrow) and seen the show Wicked, which was AMAZING. It was probably unwise to eat a banoffee pie, popcorn, munchies and ice-cream all within two hours, but it was my birthday treat. I also managed to bump into Stacey in Leicester Square, which was rather random (Stacey and I have the good fortune of sharing a birthday, although her milestone wasn't as important as mine...)

I think people were a little worried that I might start acting my age, as they bought me presents such as these:

A bendy belles Jess, courtesy of Chris. She really is as bendy as her name!

A Hot Hugs cow, part of a present from Ben and Rich. Does exactly what it says on the box.

My very own Mike Wazowski. If you don't know who he is, then you don't deserve to be told... (John bought presents for me in the hope that I wouldn't want any of them, so he would then be allowed to keep them... this was one such gift. Needless to say, he went home disappointed).

I'd just like to make a special mention to Heather's mum, who made me the most delicious, chocolatey birthday cake I've ever encounterd. Here it is:

Finally, for those who haven't seen it, I'll leave you with a little taster from Wicked:

I would like to draw your attention to three things...

1) Charlotte Still now has a blog. And her first post is really rather good (there are lots of big words in it that only students truly know how to use...) Check out the link on the right hand side of this blog.

2) While you're looking on the right hand side of the blog, have a look at the two songs I have added... one of which is from Avenue Q, and the other is just a personal favourite. Enjoy...

3) I'm not going to talk about last night, as I think there are others who can sum it up better than I can. Also, I can't be bothered. Thirdly, I don't have any good photos. But I DID want to get this Human Pyramid of Dreams in before anybody else (even though it's not my photo...):

It was my party, so I think that's allowed... Impressive, don't you think?